Superstitious

How should I begin this chapter? How should I even described these people whom are superstitious about almost everything? I have seen many types of superstitious kind in my life, (well, thats the added advantage of being in a multiracial country) mostly related to religions.

Almost every child in this country were virtually told of the stories where wolf appears in front of them after 7pm and take them for dinner, we can't sweep floor at certain period for good luck flows away, can't this cant that...if not bad luck comes...

Okay, I know, some of them are put up for good purpose. They just want the kids to listen by freaking their hearts out, but hey...if you overdo it, that's the main problem.

Extremism

Living in a multiracial country, we have been thought to be moderate and considerate to others just to prevail in harmony. But throughout the years of growing up, we have seen many extremists, typically the muslims in the west who blew up buildings, suicide bombers, making the freakiest decapitation scenes, killing & mentally torturing thousands of humans...all in the name of GOD. Everything they did was pushed deliberately pushed to God's Will, God's Command, God's Power. Since when did God wants us humans to kill one another?

No doubt, many muslims since then have also dissociate themselves from these extremist groups.

Well, I'm not here to complain about the past stories of these muslims extremist, I'm here today to voice my dissatisfaction/anger after I read a blog (lets just put it as "Blog Y"). The writer of Blog Y claims to be a Christian, whom grew up being a Catholic. Apparently, he became delusioned after some time and starts to visualize catholicism as satanic. Well, it was mentioned in that blog, all religions are satanic, but since I'm a Catholic, I will rebut just on my religion part. If praising God and spreading his gospel is all about what you do, please do it right. How can we catholics or other denominations as well being satanic when we praise and acknowledged Jesus deep from our hearts as well? Wouldn't you be characterized the same since you practice similar act? Well, of course, to the extremist minds, they are always the ONLY holy ones that God will see high upon them. God loves all men & women as His children. By discriminating, more to insulting others, especially your BROTHERS/SISTERS in Christ is sinful. A major Sin..

Even God has asked us to respect and love thy neighbours. I really do not see any issue with a Buddhist proclaiming that God loves everything in the world equally. It's their belief and unless if their belief are harming the other humankind in any other matter, then yes...go ahead and condemn.

Not being a devout Catholic, I admit that I never dare to spread the Gospels due to my very own imperfect sinful lifestyle, but at the very least I do practice what is morally /ethically right. We catholics never go around condemning other religions, unlike these bunch of extremist christians whom bring down the glory of God's Holy Name.

Last but not least, I agree with ya that God loves All Men, but to proclaim that God loves Gays as well is a No-No. Not trying to discriminate the gays for their hormone behaviour, its just their sexual activities that are not right. God created Adam and Eve for a reason dude, don't ya know? To have more childrens that can gracefully praise Him and color the Earth that Thy build. Not these........pictures...Its just the same with God loving his other "Normal" Childrens, but not their absurd way of life.

Sigh, this post is so NOT me..if given a choice, I wouldn't write about religions, but that Blog Y is really pissing me off!!!

Holiday Raya

Its only one day away..from the holiday break. Yet, didn't feel that excited about it. Probably was just too tired. Been days..hell no!, it's been weeks I'm stuck with my conference paper. Revised again after revision being done. Let's hope this is worth it=)
Just to describe what I'm gonna do the moment I reach home later. This picture shows it all.

Yay...Report is Done..

Finally the progress report is done, with acceptable results!!! OMG, wonder how many times have I repeat those testings just to get this. Thankfully, I have Hachi to take part of pressure and stress away. How? It stares at me like this picture every time my head cracks and spin.
Really loves Hachi, he can really entertain someone at all time (Well, except when he is dead asleep..)

Anyway, I thought that now I could get more sleep, but I was wrong. More works, works...
And less exercise. Sigh. I could barely jog the full round of campus anymore. Thats the problem with my stamina, I need to train a long time to get that fit. When I stopped jogging for only 2 weeks, it's back to square 1.

Can't wait to be back home during Raya, to eat all the Rendaaangggggggssss that I have missed for the past 5 yrs. Yum.....

Hope/Losses

Its been some time since I wrote, and my mind is blank again thinking what and how should I begin to acknowledge my past 2 months story. Talking about the past few posts, its all about losing weight, getting fit and six-pack agenda. No, I still haven't get those dungeon golds, but I did managed to find some bronze in that treasure hunt. I managed to lose 5-6kgs, gaining some good LBM and losing fat!!! Yay, thats something for me to scream in joy.. I mean its a good start right?I'm also heading for my bodyweight lifting/training. Its simple, no machine needed..and if I can lift 70kgs, wouldn't that be better than lifting 20-30kgs barbells? I used to be able to do only chin up, but I can now do a few times of pull ups.

July was pretty much a busy month- with more pressure from the upper ladder. Everyday is all about work work...and then exercise. The mind keeps telling myself to skip those exercise and rest more. It was really horrible at first to fight your own thoughts..Thinking again, using your own mind to fight your mind..make sense? No?

That month was also a pretty joy giver month. Minnie (my hampster) finally gave birth to 4 little mini hampsters...Taking care of them isnt any easy job..but minnie did an excellent job to her kids. I dont know how it happened. From hating her to the blue horizon due to her aggresive character to loving her again. Who can just hate her after seeing the selfless behaviour when taking care of her kids..She loves to run..She loves to climb..moves..but when faced with her own kids, she just slowly breast feed them. When they children gets slightly bigger and able to eat, she brings them food. We feed her, and she feeds them. Even better, she opened up the kuaci for them!!! Unbelievable behaviour...we really salute her for all her selfless act.. She used to snatch all the food for herself..and the newborns was the changing point.

Anyways, last sat, one of her kids died. Unknown cause. Probably lack of vitamins/food?

Minnie was so worried for him, keep feeding him and so on..but when still no reaction, she bring him some place dark..and then get a good bite. We quickly separate them, but the injury woke the kid up from the deep deep sleep. Until now we have no idea if what we have done is correct.

Today, it was Minnie's turn. After her kid's death, she was diagnosed with having a tumor at the throat. Second day, it gets bigger. She could hardly breathe and walk anymore. My heart really feel so so pain. I do not understand this. How can a tumor affect a hampster so fast? 3 days and here comes the death angels? How can such a good mother be separated from her kids so fast? Gosh, I can really feel the pain in real human mothers/kids..

We buried her nearby and I guess everytime we walked past there, the feeling will never be the same ever again..

Losing Fat

Alright, this is a long battle. It has been and will always be. The battle to get a lean body, and by that I actually meant visible solid 6 packs abs on ME. This fight is real this time. Determination is higher than before. But, how? Where should I start?

Okay, for a start, I researched a lot throughout the internet, and found all sorts of formulae/nutrition/diets/workouts/talks by all reputable people. Well, somehow I find them rather contradicting among one another. It was that very moment I found out about Joel Marion, one of the top 50 trainer in the US. It's not his body that ripped me away (since there isn't even a few shots which show his muscles), but his programs. Maybe just the way he described it...the entire program just sounds so good to me. Extreme Fat Loss. Being an avid eater and an ex-gluton person, it's plainly just difficult to STOP eating!! When I saw the phrase "you could even eat pizza every few days" I was just taken aback, but was also quite happy about it. Since it has a money back guarantee, I gave it a try. It wasn't cheap, considering the exchange rate and being in a developing country. I told my self, success comes with a sacrifice. And here, money is the sacrificial lamb. Of course no doubt I have to sacrifice more time, and effort too for this to work, but heck, ain't this my main aim?

I even got a new protein powder. I couldnt find anywhere in this small town, so have to settle for this less effective product for now. Reason? It has quite a lot of carbs and less proteins compared to the Gold Standard ones sold in shopping malls. It says lean mass gain!! I was wondering, is this another weight gain product? I want to lose weight, not the other way round!! Then I read, re-read and re-re-read again the labels. Luckily it has very low amount of calories, fat and sugar (which is good for starters like me). I'm such a noob in choosing these protein powders. Previously I only prefer to buy fresh eggs and eat the egg whites as good consumable proteins, but apparently this isn't sufficient.

Here is a picture of the protein product I got.

Next, I bought a bathroom weighing scale, and the very next day, the program starts!!!

It's a short term program actually, being less than a month. Let me check if it really works and I might blog about it in near future.

LEXMA mouse appears

As it is..a red mouse appear in my room, with the word "LEXMA" en-printed on the surface...

There goes my Sensonic G-20 mouse I bought almost a year ago. It failed me once, somewhere end of last year. It somehow helps me to double click even though i only clicked an icon once.

And after obtaining a brand new one as replacement, it became faulty again after only about 4 months. Scrolling problem, and not sensitive anymore. After all, this is a G-laser mouse, but I have trouble using them in many places, eg. matress, polished tiles/marbles. Weird and bad quality I supposed, though I love the huge size that fits well in my hand.

And this is my new mouse, well maybe temporarily till I found a better one. It wasn't my first choice, looking at the size. It was 2 inch shorter than the Sensonic one, making my finger tip sticking out. Nevertheless, it still works well, and I hope this retractable thingy don't fail me so soon.

Soy milk -Good/Bad?

Recently heard that soy milk is really a bad choice if we wanted to reach the goal-SIX PACK ABS. Not too sure about it though, cause the box definitely mentioned little calories/low sugar, but with 5gm of proteins with only a glass. So, I did read up on these issue.

Read many news/articles/blogs..

They says: Soy products include tofu/soy milk and so on.. do not cause you extra fat. It somehow releases more estrogen hormones into the body and this helps to retain fat. This extra boost of estrogen level will only take place if we consume "HUGE" quantity of soy product. Therefore, I think its still safe if we drink them moderately, coupled with exercise. Soy products can lower the LDL cholesterol, the manufacturer claims. But to what extend, and how true is this, we don't know for sure. After all, they could spend billions of dollars just to advertise the good news of soy, surely an extra million to bribe the scientist wouldn't matter that much.

Nevertheless, there are other side effects too, some claiming that it can caused cancer-breast & so on. Not many articles mention about this. But there is something that is very true. The chinese who had many guinea pigs during the "dynasty" period had done many testings regarding this fermented soy milk-tofu. It was consumed very little, just to enhance the taste of other dishes that were cooked together. This simple recipe was brought to Japan, where tofu is then employed in Miso soup. Just a few slices of tofu brings the soup to such a delicious taste.

Conclusion: I would still drink soya milk & eat tofu, but maybe done in moderate style.

Inheritance

After my previous post on favouritism, I felt compelled to touch more on typical family issues that were endangering family relationships.

Inheritance- Properties in any kind (money/houses/shops/condoms/dildo/shits etc..) left over by the deceased parents to their next of kin (probably their children)

It is only natural that each parents leave something for their own children when they themselves leave to another money-less zone. Maybe there is, but surely it won't be the same currency we are using in Mother Earth?? Anyway, I'm not going to argue about that. So in conclusion, the children would be happy & thankful to their folks, thinking their life would be much more meaningful & comfortable. But the truth is no. How could you be happier alone than being close with your siblings -brothers & sisters.? Some of course are very fortunate to inherit a lump sum and yet forged close relationship with their siblings thru the spirit of SHARING.

A picture of jealousy: due to love

Nevertheless, inheritance causes many family breaking up, with curses hurling among one another. Elder brother will claim that being the eldest, he command the higher percentage of inheritance-say 60%, and the remaining is divided among the rest. The youngest will not fail to mention that he will need a huge sum to either study/do business or some shit. So the list goes on.. but what is important is neither of them would be satisfied with whatever the results of dividing is. Hatred & jealousy will slowly creep up their sleeves till their tiny little bronchus strips. Pop!! The family string that binds everyone together broke & neither heard from each other ever again from that day. 30 years memories of playing together under the field, snatching food/ hide & seek game/swimming & badminton together will just remain as memory forever.

That is just one of the worst example when the parents do not write their wills before their death. So what if they did? Will they stop arguing & fighting about this inheritance?? Well, probably if the parents did the right thing and gave EQUAL treatment to all of their children. Yeah, this is so RELATED to my previous post, but then again, if parents were so one-sided, their children might just go their own way. Which child would just sit quietly and happily when the lawyer turns up at your parents funeral, telling you "you only inherits 10%, your eldest bro 60% and your younger bro got the remaining 30%" Well, 10% might mean a lot if your parents are rich fellas, but the truth that were told thru this will only symbolizes one thing- parents love to other siblings are much greater than you. And then, you'll feel dejected, feeling as lonely as the guppy fish in a huge pond.

So you see, which ever way, inheritance of money really troubles many families & I have witnessed a few good ones. My suggestion for parents is to always write a proper will and be fair to all children. You bring them to this world, leave each of them with something that they can remember for their lifetime. If not, better spend all your own money & just give each of the children a toy bear or something similar. By that way, they would not argue among one another & they have something to remind of your presence.

New Member to the family-Hachi

After watching the 8.1 Rating for "Hachiko: The dog story", I felt really touched deep inside. Well, of course follow my own sentimental heart, I named my new hampster-Hachi- with the hope that it behave as loyal as the dog in the movie. Naive, how naive...

We select him out of about 50? Hmm...the lucky one..

He smells like shit...

He is different from Minnie...colour wise..(he is an Indian Hampster I would say)

He has super big eyes

He hates human touch (at least that was the beginning case)

He loves to eat SHIT...omg..wonder how those pet owners treat them...must have starve them till they behave like that.

Anyway, I still do not have good clear shots of him yet, so couldn't post his pictures yet. For the first few days, he squeaks frequently..He was really afraid, I could sense his fear..But no longer these days. We played with him so much that he just got used to us. Finally...

20th March 2010

20th March..
A day after my father's birthday..
My Aunt Valerie birthday..
and now..
its my poor Mickey (Syrian hampster) death day..

It was a shocking morning, to wake up and find your "son" died, with its head almost severed off. Blood was splattered everywhere..I could even see his veins popping out.
All left from his cute little head, was his front mouth..I do not understand this.....how could this happen? what causes it? When it happened? It was okay the night before (in fact it was this early morning, 3am that I left them alone downstairs). Images of Mickey doing some of his usual masculine stunts flashes across my heads & eyes.

Next, we turned to Minnie..Guess what? She's soundly asleep in her Home. It was as if nothing had happened. She's the only one staying with Mickey all these while. Surely there's no other predator out there in the living room, since she's still safe and sound. Then, to my horror (although very much expected), I saw her reddish Vampire fangs and the claws of the Siberian Eagle. All dressed up in Mickey's blood. Quickly bathe her up, couldn't believe what is happening.
After all, it was almost about a month they were staying together. It was only few days ago that we caught them making out. Now, Minnie ATE Mickey??? This is too hard to digest...

Me and Dear was supposed to be out shopping/dating by then, but because of this incident, we only managed to have our lunch at 4.30pm (no breakfast). We decided we still need that outing to release some of the stress/trauma. Dear recommend me to some cafe called the clinic cafe, but then again, seeing all the male doctors just isn't appetizing. The movie we watched was hilarious but I know there's something just ain't right today in my heart.

All in all...we did enjoyed ourselves very much, with the relax feelings..shopping..and great dinner. Managed to drop by at Tambun for its fresh seafoods. We were again very lucky because we reached there at 10.45pm, and they closed at 11pm. It was a rainy night, and the road had changed so much. If I had missed another turn, probably there goes our dinner.

p/s- Just want to dedicate this special page to my Mickey..I really miss you deep down inside. The first look that you pierced into my eyes the moment you "pop out" of my fingers will remain forever.

Shake shake shake....

I felt like I had a vibrator all over me..Damn!! This must be an advance version, with the capability of inducing heat up to 60C!! Only thing is that it's not my vagina feeling the excitement, but the little bump on my stomach. Well, you guessed it, it was a slimming belt!!

So Here it goes..Gintell Advance E-slim version. RM 498. We patronize the entire Gurney looking for one. I was rather attracted to the Osim U kimono, because of the two roller wheels in front. I recall the foot massager I tried back then, and I had preferred something to roll over my tiny toes than just vibrating them. But it was a marked up price at RM 799. Imagined how much we could buy with the RM 300 difference. Plus, if we were to get the Gintell, they will give an extra eye massager for FREE. Sounds good! After all, it was just an extra fat burning measure during the night time right? Well, I hope it works..I really do..My love handle is getting a little out of control at late. Hmm.., I forgot to mention it, this was a birthday gift from my Dear. Thanks Dear! It was a pleasant and thoughtful gift. Would rather have items like that than other non-practical gifts (eg. clothes). At least I have a slightly brighter chance of getting my 6 packs abs (extra 0.2%). Lolz. Wait a minute, my Dear also baked 2 cakes for me, and another one for her friend. All whom I had tried and ate gluttonously. *wonders how my 6-pack will come after these sinful creme rich cakes." Lolz.. But credit has to be given to her for the new style in making those cakes. I, for one who is not really into cakes, felt the cakes baked that day was really good. One can have the recipes from her blog. (www.fyle23.blogspot.com)

Lets not forget to thank my parents for the lovely b'day present in the form of "cash". It must be feeling good to have an angpao so soon right after CNY.

Gintell Advance E-slim

Another issue, it has been raining almost every day for the past week. This must be a miracle for a curse land like this. Yes, its the El-Nino..dry season..bla bla..but who would expect a dry season throughout the entire year? Everyone must be screaming in joy now, and I barely want to leave home everytime it rains. Perhaps just to enjoy the cool breeze, or to listen to the musics played by the rain drops.

Better stop writing already, need to continue vibrate off all my fats..I hope one fine day, i can really shout out loud in this blog "I have lost 10kg!!"

Sleep walking

Last weekend, bought an Haier oven from Tesco. We were so anxious of baking things, well..for me it would be all about shepherd/chicken pies, pizza's, lasagna, cheese baked rice and whatever that I can learn from the Internet. For dear, it would ultimately be..CAKES!! ^_^

So for the first day, managed to bake some "fake" shepherd pies. Of course, the authentic ones would be using lamb meat, but due the difficulty in obtaining one here combine with its high cost pushes me to other alternatives meat. End-up with some minced pork.
It still taste good after all. Didn't put up any of the baked pies picture here, coz Dear has edited those photos with her cute bears. And no..I wouldn't put those bears up, not on my blog at least.

Then come monday, it was a tiring day. Slept at 3am, yet been awaken at 8am to go lab. Oh no..anyway, pushed any remaining healthy bones I had to move. Inches by inches, I crawl..to the bathroom.


This is how I looked in the morning.


And this is what happens after a day work with minimal sleep (4 hours). Gosh, I could barely stand even a night without proper resting time. The extremely hot weather gives us the opportunity to do our work in PG room during night time.


Day 2 come. Again, insufficient sleep. Well, depends on how one define that, but to me, 5-6 hrs of sleep isn't going to make my day.
Finally, this is how I managed my look throughout Day 2 in lab. Running around like dogs do, coupled with headaches caused by insufficient sleeps and medication taken the night before, ruined my day.
Alright, better off now and start dozing off.

Start work again..

Been back to KL for around 10 days during X-mas season. Bought the famous Ipoh " Lou Wong taugeh chicken" and some lean roasted pork meat back home. It was really delicious, nothing could describe the feeling. The gravy seems to melt through the throat the moment it touches with my amilase. (FYI; amilase are enzymes that digest your food in your saliva) Just wondering how people in Ipoh gets to maintain their bodyweight in ideal condition with those amazing foods.

I thought we would be joining grandma for lunch and so on, but it didn't turn out that way. We spend most of the time with my family, my parents in peculiar. Who would have thought of eating Buffet Steamboat TWICE in a week?? It cost RM 22.90/person; the food was okay, ate really lots of vegetables. Altogether, I easily gained a few kilos throughout this trip. It was quite a meaningful one, well maybe more to me. Spending time with family members and Charlie (he's always part of us) is something that I'm really looking forward to catch up. Sorry to my Dear for the lack of shopping time in KL. Big thanks to Dear for making a superb sex-partner for Charlie.
He finally found something to release his lust, and no longer on my legs!!! Yay, really happy..but I think sizes does matter. He seems unsatisfied with the smaller size partner.

Went to Genting before the new Semester begin. Lost around RM110 to Uncle Lim. Gained some experiences there though, with some embarrassing moments.
And now...
Back to work....craps..

Fantasticccccc....

In just a week, had got my new Sonic Gear Tatoo Duo 3 from the PC fair. Priced at RM 169, with another headset as free gift definitely makes my heart moves. Well, the gift could come handy to my little dear. Yay, now no longer need to watch avi. movies in such horrible situation where I have to depend so much on the movie subtitles.

Up next, received my FIRST e-bay bought item. The post was sent here yesterday but I wasn't here so only able to redeem them today. Nothing great, a compatibility Lithium ion battery for my Pentax Optio s6 camera.

Well, the ori was just way off my budget. Compare this: RM 50 vs RM 170. If they could perform almost the same standard, then its worth it already. In fact, the compatibility one comes in 1200mAh while the ori was a mere 700mAh with both having 3.7V. Lets see how it performs when i utilise the new one this coming weekend. By the way, the ori definitely looks better. Here is some of the pictures taken.

Fishy fishy...where are you...

Question of the year, where can a tiny little 2 cm guppy fish go when it just dissapear over the night from its container?

Initial thoughts: Surely it must have jump out and suicide
It was a wrong hypnosis and I couldn't even find his poor body. Was rather sad about it, after all he was the only survivor since my another glass container crack on its own and the entire colony died of dehydration. This is such a mystery to be solved. Now all I'm left is with a 5mm baby one. After watching it grow from some micron size body and separating it from the others, this particular one had been growing steadily well.

Over the weekend

Spend last Saturday in Bukit Merah Laketown with her family. It was an enjoyable trip, yet very tiring. Went for dim sum in the morning and fried porridge (specialty food in Serdang). Damn, i didnt take any photo's abt the food. Playing water is always best and suits all family members. It went well apart from some hiccups (eg. got conned into paying whole package-includes baby chairlifts, which cannot be paid using touch and go cards-10% discount)

Sunday- rest day, was really exhausted the day before, body muscle was aching badly after the weight balancing act on the string. We actually raided the both the behind house and nibong pasar malam due to extra time.

Monday- Had a shocked and disgusted early morning when saw 5 dog-catchers going for the mongrel dog-named 'ah ying' . The doggie wasn't my cup of milo, but never would I wish for what had happened to her. They drag her by the feet, move to the lone alley, and then "Bang". Game Over???!!! It was really miserable to hear this, considering she did always protect our houses. But we knew something bad would have happen then, when passers-by would be chased. I thought they had the similar SOP with SPCA, where they will bring the dog back for at least a month, and then injected to sleep if no one adopts them.
Really kills my day..my heart felt for the dog. RIP doggie.

Tues- now we heard of rumours about H1N1 in eng campus??? what is this? Luckily we no longer staying there. We shall see what happens.

RA work? what work?

Being a research assistant sounds cool, but being a pathetic one is away from one's thought. Well, being the latter, all I do every single day is eat, head straight to PC lab for internet use, back home and cook cook cook..eat then sleep..Though many ppl might actually envy these kind of life with RM 600 basic pay, I rather not. I still look thru some journals, enquire stuff from suppliers and so on. It was a little busy and was anxiously waiting for their damn slow reply, but it was worth it all. When the deal struck the tip of the berg, the feeling was like soaring into the deep sky. Its like I finally did something useful for my job.LOLz.

TM finally allow us to register our Streamyx line today. The transfer by the idiotic previous tenant finally went thru. It's crazy waiting for almost 2 months without any internet. Met so many idiots these days. Had been trying to be positive, but when u faced ppl like that, you just have a word to describe them, IDIOTS.

new house, new hope

Just shift everything into the new house yesterday. Cleaning the house took us about 5 hrs, then shifting things from another house takes about another 4 hrs. Been exhausted already. Anyway, hope things will get better once then. Hurray. After viva...home o home.

Still breathing

Everyday has been a lie for me. I lied to myself that all these sufferings will end soon and yet I'm still so busy with my workloads. I do not understand. Its the final semester, why cant these lecturers just let us off for a little fun?? Dont they have feelings>> a feeling human beings should have at the very least? Compassion? Mercy? Sigh. Hope tomorrow after I hand in my Masters proposal, things will be better. My thesis is almost up. I do not care anymore. I know he sure have lots to say abt it, but i couldnt care less. How much marks can it affect my cgpa? worse, with masters degree...who cares anymore abt my bachelor degree.. Things change the moment i decided to do masters. I hope i dont regret my own decision. I felt sorry that i couldnt take care of my mum back at home , even after her retirement. I was quite determined back then that i would care for her better after neglecting her for the past 4 years. I do not have much choice now, with the ailing economy not looking any brighter anytime soon. Just hoping to get the Intel scholarship, at least with higher pay. OMG, since when did money matter so gravely for me?? Am i changing? Oh no, I really misses the old days when all i can think of its mini homeworks and then enjoy all day. Maths + english which are so easy those days.. I really misses those good old days. If one day some scientist could invent a time traveller machine, then i probably would be so eager going back there. Now thinking back, being an engineer..what can i do for the world..what can i change in this world? Nothing. Its all about getting the monthly cheque for some thinking. People can still survive without me here. But if i took a different path in the past and be a doctor or teacher, I could save lives or help the poor to read/write. Why am i feeling this insanity in me only when I m about to grad? I hope one day I would end up being someone useful to the society and not just interpreting graphs and getting my allowance.